POEM: Parade of Virtues, 5:45am Thursday

PARADE OF VIRTUES, 5:45am THURSDAY

You wrong us

We let You know how

- is that not love?

You ask how to do better

We believe you can

- is that not faith?

You stumble or fail

You get another chance

- is that not patience?

You obstruct

We continue

- is that not persistence?

You press down

We rise up

- is that not determination?

Though You fail

We believe you'll succeed 

some day

- is that not hope?

You renew the cycle,

still We walk among you

- is that not tolerance?

We've offered You answers

when You have sought them

- is that not charity?

You ignore or dismiss this

and think You're doing fine

- is that not ignorance?

Poem: BURDEN OF PROOF

BURDEN OF PROOF

Prove to me

you can actually believe

Can you cite evidence

that my efforts

have any chance to actually

change your mind

For a chance of change
I have to have faith

in your good faith

though it seldom

proves to be so

I have every reason to doubt

you actually want to know

and want to try

rather than to simply

bog me down

or shut me up

If you actually did

I have to believe
you'd look for yourself

There is more than enough proof

You would choke on citations

cough up study

after study
be sick to death
of mounting evidence

you would drown in proof

while I have no proof

you would actually believe

this time

Poem: I OFFER MIXED BLESSINGS

I OFFER MIXED BLESSINGS

I do not wish you ill

I wish you awareness

I wish you realization

I wish you an open mind

open ears

and an open heart

When those truly come

the weight of your ignorance

will cause confusion

turmoil

sorrow

pain

May you lament your past perceptions

and may the ignorance of others

drive you mad
drive you to speech
drive you to action

You might understand
our rage

our resilience

our restraint

the depth of our faith

and our dismissed strength

You may even grow

to resent their resistance,

remember it was yours,

and know at times

it could too easily be
again

I do not wish you ill —

only the experience

of awareness
as catalyst

and also
as curse

Poem: BLACK ENOUGH ACTOR

BLACK ENOUGH ACTOR

I see others sweat,

see them wait and prepare

almost all of them looking like

a Black Actor

I hear them sing, one by one

voices sounding like Motown

or church —

knowing that's not me

my voice is not like that

I hear them perform, speak,

and recite

each one dramatic,

whether soft or raised voice

each one sounding like

a real, Black Actor

Is that what they want?

Is it better to choose

my favorite Angry Aaron

or stick with the coin flips

and be the only one like me

they'll likely see?

Should I use my time clowning,

geeking up hallowed space

before local theater

decision-making power?

Fear makes safer seem sounder,

stops me spreading my self

and my soul

Sinister, stifling whispers of fear

make safer seem smarter,

sensible,

sounder

stopped me from spreading

my self

and my soul

Almost.

I can't stand up to be counted

if I count myself out,

a different design of triple threat

but am I Black Enough,

or will they be won

by the One And Only Me?

Poem: THE KIDS ARE ALL RIGHT

THE KIDS ARE ALL RIGHT

Kids,

you are all right

you are fine

yes, you're doing fine

do not allow yourselves

to be crushed

there are those of us

who will stand for you

who will stand with you

some who want you

to stand up for yourselves

to stand with each other

to get more involved

to get off the couch

are now standing against you

shouting you down 

all from their couch 

in so many ways

they have been crushed

and let things happen

again

and again

they have been crushed

ground down from the grind

and convinced

that there's nothing you can do

but give thoughts and prayers

say thoughts and prayers

and thank American God

it wasn't you

you stand up

and march

and make sure you're heard

because if things never change

it could have been you

who could have

changed them

thoughts and prayers

and thank American God

that right here, right now

yes, it is You

Poem: I BELIEVE IN MAGIC

I BELIEVE IN MAGIC

There is magic, child,

in how people rush

to justify the unjust

how protectors

can kill with impunity

and almost 

every

time

be found guiltless

and go free

There is magic

in how speaking out

is a bigger problem

than injustice itself

There is magic

in how the right act

is an affront to liberty

in how doing better

is slavery

and the expectation to do better

is oppression

There is magic in how

somehow

there is not Enough to go around

but there is always Enough

for more of the same

There is magic

in how racism thrives

but no one is racist

in how sexism lives

as excuses die

and in how They demand

you always say "Please"

to get Them to give you

what you should already have

There is magic around you, child.

Just open your eyes.

Poem: COME TO THE TABLE

COME TO THE TABLE

This work has needed doing

There have already been others doing it

You may be joining just now

but you are welcome here

Come to the table

and see how old it is

See the nicks and scratches,

gouges and splinters,

knots and holes

and chipped off edges

Acknowledge these and remember

that you are welcome here

Look at the smooth places,

the polish, the varnish,

the grain, the stain

the way parts are patched

and joined

and mended

The care with which it was made and maintained

Come here and know:

We will laugh and cry

fuss and fight

teach and learn

speak and listen

struggle and strive 

Come here and know

it will not be easy

people always leave

and some come back

Look, now

See all this

Know all this

Think

Reflect

Make your choice

With all this, know

you are welcome here 

You Still Have Much To Learn

YOU STILL HAVE MUCH TO LEARN

If your belief

your memory

is dependent on a symbol

for its strength

then your memory

your belief

is a weak one indeed.

Followers of Christ

did without crosses

Tribes of Judea

did without stars

People on whose backs this country 

was built

the people whose lands

were stripped

(so we would eventually
have strip malls)

did without

a place for ceremony

a place to call home

and without the dignity

of being recognized

as equal humans

And if only you would look

(beyond maintaining

your own reflection)

you would notice

they still do

Your comfort then

commanded as much priority

over being decent people

as you demand it does now

This country

is not just yours.

NaPoWriMo: 29 April 2015

Even when doing something you enjoy,

No matter how fulfilling it is,

Or how you're living out your dream,

Sometimes

you still don't want to get out of bed.

NaPoWriMo: 28 April 2015

I saw the coat
and wanted to try it on
I was going to be
that version of a man
that tells his woman what he's going to do.

Instead,
I offered
that I would like to try it on
if she and my friends would please wait.

I was ordered to do it.

I was that version of a man
that did as I was told
as she beamed
and swooned in advance.

NaPoWriMo: 27 April 2015

DEFEND THE STATUS QUO

Ladies and gentlemen,

start your engines!

Sharpen your tongues,

engage your ignorance,

and make sure your privilege is packed up and stowed

for its own protection

and yours.

Batten the hatches

and defend your right

not to be uncomfortable.

Questioning is treason.

Challenge is attack.

Rise and defend the status quo

for it is on the ropes

and needs brave soldiers

like you

to do something —

or better yet, nothing —

to insure long life.

NaPoWriMo: 26 April 2015

Are you kidding me?

Padiddle!

Cyclops!

My car has one light —

A week after it was in the shop.

NaPoWriMo: 25 April 2015

CON: FOUND IT!

My mind was just blown.

I had some help, though:

A broken ankle,

help needed,

and a festival

that put me in the right place

at the right time.

A fast walker's nightmare,

but a geek/nerd dream.

Thank my stars,

at last I have been to a con.

NaPoWriMo: 24 April 2015

UNUSED INTRO

On a chilly Midwestern Friday

very much like today — 

in fact it was today — 

one man rode down to Chicago from the Twin Cities

to face his latest performer challenge: performing his solo improv

at an honest-to-God improv festival.

NaPoWriMo: 23 April 2015

IT'S ALL RELATIVE

I keep amassing this list:

Moving seems like standing still.

Progress seems like regression.
Sticking with it seems like giving up.

Success feels like failure.

The punchline is

that dualism seems to be

the only way.

NaPoWriMo: 22 April 2015

I'm not exactly Imelda Marcos,
but I own four pairs of clown shoes.
That would be even more strange
if I weren't a clown.

I have almost double that amount
in pants.

NaPoWriMo: 21 April 2015

ASK AGAIN LATER

I don't know when or why,
but one day
years ago
I gained the tendency
to occasionally stop
and ask
(into the ether,
the universe,
the wherever)
about my life.
Not in the normal, human way,
but as if it all —
every little thing —
could be unraveled and answered
like a Magic 8-Ball.

It's not real,
so why?
The doubt,
uncertainty,
the questions of
"What will happen if I choose this?"
or "Will this go right?"
are normal,
typical,
unavoidably universal
and human
(and even moreso with an active mind).

It does no good.
There are better ways to create a life,
right?

("All signs point to yes".)

NaPoWriMo: 20 April 2015

DEFERRED REPLACEMENT

I don't think I've procrastinated like this before.
To be clear:
Two week contacts?
I use them for a month,
and even then, only when I'm performing.
If I'm not in a show
a box of six lasts for months.

Shaving cartridges?
I normally change them out
every two to three weeks.

The current cartridge
no longer has the aloe strip.
No more lubricating strip.
And it's been going for about three months.

Just because
I haven't yet done
the Dollar Shave or Henry's thing
and I now refuse to pay
fifteen dollars for a pack.

I'll just use extra gel
and more time with a hot cloth.

NaPoWriMo: 19 April 2015

PUBERTY'S REVENGE

Think you're an adult?
Adore someone, newly met —
Awkwardness returns

NaPoWriMo: 18 April 2015

DON' WANNA

More and more these days I realize
that I don't really want to get out of bed.
Not yet anyway.

My body wants to wake at 7
or 7:30
or any other time
at least ten minutes before the alarm.

Most days I'm busy
doing work I sought out
in a field I love
but I still relish the thought
of days spent
having nothing on a to-do list.